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06 May 2008 @ 01:42 am
Comic City 17.... and the future!!! :O  
So, yesterday ended my 2-day weekend at Comic City! It's one of Japan's bigger doujinshi conventions (though not even half the size/scope of the biggest, which is Comicket), and let's say... it was an experience! A big, big learning experience! I had a table with Eda on both days, and I learned a lot through this experience on the time, commitment, and mechanics of making comics to sell for people. Ultimately, I think that for varied reasons the ordeal was really hard for me. I've been having a hard time ever since it ended (i.e., all of today).

After a LOT of soul-searching today, and a lot of agonizing and trying to assuage my self-doubt, my fears (I can't do it, I won't succeed, my art isn't good enough yet, I can't write stories people will want to pay for..), my everything, I really feel like I want to keep on working. I want to try HARD. I really, really want to push myself, and make something that people will like (love!!), feel inspired by, and that I feel proud of. Some things that when I look at them, I go, "wooooow, Jamie. You rock, seriously." Okay, maybe it sounds a little bit stupid when I put it like that, but it's how I really look at it.

Well, in any case, it was a long, tough day today. Nobody can be harder on me than myself, and all... -_-;; I'm kind of starting to put together an attack plan, to seriously grasp my destiny. A way to do it....

1. Sign up for Comitia 85, which is a BIG Original-only doujinshi event at Tokyo Big Site. If there is a good place to get a large exposure, this is it. I haven't decided on what genre I am going to sign up for, and how many, and I have until the end of June to make that decision and pay for table space.

2. Work on developing these doujinshi. I need to choose what I am going to do, and right now I am working on two ideas. One is Ytheru and Alix's story (naming in progress), a yaoi story that I began to write with my now-housemate aionwatha, years ago. It's hard, hard yaoi, but has a simple premise and I believe, a really interesting story later on. I talked with Ami, and she would be willing to do a side-story, while I would have the main one. If I don't do this for Comitia (it is likely I will, though I will have to be satisfied before I let it go to print!), then I will do it for the following one or an original yaoi event. It is defintiely getting made at some time!

I am also pondering working with the stories of Taku&Kyou (written with alsie), and the Yonteia story (written with aimaru). Probably one day I will do both, but it's pending on time. Right now, there is a lot on my plate, so those will go on the back-burner for the moment...

The other idea that I am seriously considering for Comitia is a post-apocalyptic story that I started looking at last summer. Over the almost year that's passed, I've fleshed the world out a bit, mostly in my mind rather than on paper. But I really, really like where it is going. And I was thinking (based on the art style of a friend's friend), I'd really like to try drawing something that's just a bit "moe".. Er, just for explanation, "moe" is a big trend in Japan right now, focusing on how hot/cute/etc a girl is. A lot of it's somewhat loli, but not necessarily adult in nature. The story that I'm working on right now is not going to be adult at all, just have a bit of a moe-style of drawing, if that makes sense.. If you want to see what I mean, I opened up my deviant art account for the first time ever, so that people can follow along with me: http://hinoai.deviantart.com/art/In-at-the-beginning-84809892
Feel free to leave me a comment/note! ^^ You can see what I mean with the rough style there.. My friend Adrian has said that he'd love to do a book with me for Comitia, so I'm hoping that I can talk to him about this world more when I see him at work on Thursday, and maybe he'd be up to doing this. ^_^

3. Before I start actually working on these book(s), I need to finish 2 pages for Eda's Saji/Louise book. This will hopefully be mostly-accomplished tomorrow! After this, I need to work on 2-3 pages for the Gundam 00 english anthology that I'm co-producing (?? lol) with Eda for Anime Expo. This is going to be great! I have my ideas mostly down, just need to get them done. I'm glad it's so few pages, because I think that I will be a lot happier with the work that I can do with them.

4. After I've decided what book(s) for Comitia and come up with circle/title names, I will get to work on the books! Of course while doing the others I will still work on character designs/story.

5. Don't forget to work on the launch for Kappamaki, my webcomic! Wow, the work piles up! But I think people will really like it, even if it's just silly fluff. ^^ Need to talk to Gin about linking each other...

That's all for now. I can't believe that I'm not in bed now, I'm about to drop from exhaustion (emotional, mostly). I need to be up early to start drawing when Eda comes over (and clean up the clutter from packing so many things recently!).

I definitely could use a few hugs. It's been a stressful time recently, and I'm having a really hard time moving beyond them. But it's one step at a time, when you come to obstacles, yknow.. Even though I've tripped and hurt my knees, I refuse to give up without a fight....!
overthebones on May 5th, 2008 06:34 pm (UTC)
Dropped you a DA comment.

Work does pile up, but after you get into the swing of it, it gets better and better and soon you've finished things you can barely remember starting. Good luck!
百加☆nitaspitas on May 6th, 2008 12:48 am (UTC)
*hugs* gambatte, jamie~!!
百加☆nitaspitas on May 6th, 2008 12:48 am (UTC)
sorry ^^; i do this all the time... see a reply button and click on it ^^;;;;;