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14 December 2005 @ 03:59 pm
いつまでも挑み続けて行こう I'll keep up this challenge forever~!  
I just love that line from one of the old Tenimyu songs. It's very applicable.

Though, this it doesn't count on Tuesdays as this is how I felt during/after japanese class yesterday:

They pretty much told me to take an easier class... only they don't offer any easier classes, because in Shinjuku at this school there aren't enough low level students. They also told me not to look anything up in my dictionary during class. But OTHER PEOPLE DO. They said I should listen instead, but they don't get that I AM listening, no matter what else I'm doing. I got into trouble a bit in high school for drawing and not paying attention, but they never believed me that I was always paying attention. I aced all my classes so I do wonder how they felt about that. And 95% of the words they use I don't know yet, so how am I supposed to understand from the context if I can't even understand the words that make up the context? It makes no sense.

And they wrote me a note saying that 'in order to catch up to the other students' I should study these certain textbooks. WTF?! HOW RUDE!! What do they think I've been doing?! That's one of the rudest things I've ever heard. First off.. I haven't been in Japan as long as any of these people and unlike every single one of them, I didn't take classes outside of Japan before coming. My high school and college never offered them. Second off, the way it's worded is VERY VERY insulting. It makes me feel as if they think I'm stupid. OH HELL NO. I have a higher IQ than probably anybody in the building (including all the people that work there), and just because I haven't had as much experience in Japanese does NOT make me stupid. I think I've learned a LOT for the time that I've been here and the fact that I can't afford to pay for classes.

But, you know.. I'm SICK of feeling illiterate when I'm NOT stupid. I have a genius-level IQ (don't care if it's boasting.. it's true) and it's frustrating to not be able to do what I want. Saaaa... gah, just because I haven't learned all the words that other people have yet DOES NOT MAKE ME STUPID. SO frustrating.. SO FRUSTRATING!!

So, there you go.... that's actually the main thing that's been stressing me out lately. It's the #1 problem. It's becoming such a big problem for me that I'm having trouble sleeping well, eating well, and other things. Oh, I'm studying. I've stepped up the studying, actually, but it is still a LONG road to where I want to go.

Reprise: いつまでも挑み続けて行こう
Current Music: Nagayama Takashi - Ame Oto
キモさ満々♡ 미친 외국인dilettantka on December 14th, 2005 07:24 am (UTC)
... :( They are just trying to help, but in a rather clueless way, I think. (I didn't take any classes before coming here, either)

I can tell you're really frustrated. Maybe if we put our heads together, we can come up with a better way to learn that will be more fun and more natural?

Does it cheer you up to know that I got a slip from Kuroneko today? I'm having them redeliver the tickets tonight. We'll finally know if our Kimeru tickets are any good...!

Also, did you ask at the Indian place about Friday night?
Hi-chan (火ちゃん)hinoai on December 14th, 2005 08:10 am (UTC)
I think that them writing that was really rude of them.. And it wasn't any misuse of english, it was written in perfect english. I felt like crying right there in the middle of class, it sounded so demeaning.

Yes let's put our heads together *hugs*. Two heads are better than one! Speaking of which, up for shopping after all tomorrow? We're meeting at 4:30, but will probably be out plenty late. ^^

I'm gonna ask at the indian place in a little bit. Gonna go grab dinner there with my last 1000 yen. ^^;;; So broke.
(no subject) - dilettantka on December 14th, 2005 08:14 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - hinoai on December 14th, 2005 08:19 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - dilettantka on December 14th, 2005 08:27 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - hinoai on December 14th, 2005 08:33 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mizukiaya on December 14th, 2005 08:54 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - hinoai on December 14th, 2005 08:12 am (UTC) (Expand)
L.impressioniste on December 14th, 2005 07:29 am (UTC)
I'm really sorry you're having such a difficult time. I wish I could help.
aly Says \ ألينramble_corner on December 14th, 2005 07:39 am (UTC)
don't let it get to you *hugs*
considering the fact it have a different writing system altogether had been enough to make me delay for some time and you had done that and more
Good Luck though . hope you could study better
rainrukawarainrukawa on December 14th, 2005 07:41 am (UTC)
aww.. evil~~ at least you know that you're trying, right? (^-^)
Well~ hope you feel better!! (~.~)
Chiakichiaki777 on December 14th, 2005 07:57 am (UTC)
It's the opposite for me over there. I'm fluent in English, and they think I can't speak. They also think I'm a dangerous murderer like other Americans... >.< Really gets to me sometimes.

Yeah, those people can sound really rude.
tsubon on December 14th, 2005 08:08 am (UTC)
Trying to help is one thing, but being rude about it is just...er, rude.

*hugs* Keep it up! I don't know you very well, but I think you are highly intelligent. I think you will be able to get through this, and you can show those rude people a thing or two.

Good luck and feel better.
Deltethniadeltethnia on December 14th, 2005 08:46 am (UTC)
Miss you!!
Happy Holidays! email me! I have new email
Hi-chan (火ちゃん)hinoai on December 14th, 2005 09:01 am (UTC)
Re: Miss you!!
*hugs* I MISS YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ♥ I'll write you there!
Sheryl Nome: ed/al fightpocket_girl on December 14th, 2005 09:09 am (UTC)
uh, i know it. when you can't speak properly, they think you're stupid! but they should think, that since you're speaking it - it DOES make you NOT stupid already.
especially when you have high IQ... it feels very insulting ;_;
mine is above average too, i guess :) but I'm lazy because of this :)

well, in classes i'm taking, there is no such discrimination, and i'm the weakest student in the strongest class, because I'm bad with kanji yet. The other students are 30-40 years old, and they're Korean and Taiwanese, and one person from India, who took 2kyu 5 years ago, and 1kyu this year - so I suppose she's in Japan for a long time - but her intonations quite "gaijin"-ese. So, everyone is naturally good with kanji's. But no one even tried to insult me, and when I can't read some kanji, they help me.

If you want, you can try this school - it's in Meguro (I go to Gakugei-Daigaku Station to go there)... well, may be, it's kind of tricky to go there for you, but not really far from Shinjuku.
Classes begin from 10th of January. You'll be able to find a class of your level, I think :)
It's not free, but really cheap.
Hi-chan (火ちゃん)hinoai on December 14th, 2005 01:05 pm (UTC)
Ooooh! Thank you for the information, I'm going to look up your school!

I would definitely be interested in taking classes there. You said that it was really cheap once before and I was really interested! ^____^
Kei: glomp!aoi_tenshi on December 14th, 2005 10:48 am (UTC)
T_T *HUGS* That's so not fair...just because you don't know the language doesn't necessarily mean that you're not smart =/ When will people learn? *snugs* You can make it! Just be paitent and give yourself time! Also that drawing is super cute =D *luffs*

Oh yea oh yea! I'm going to try sending out your package Friday...? I keep procrastinating T_T I feel so bad because I was supposed to send it so long ago, but I will for sure find all of it tomorrow and I'll mail it off so that hopefully it'll get there in time for Christmas >.< But yes present for you is on it's way =D
alkfhalsidjalssan on December 14th, 2005 11:22 am (UTC)
>___< Damn!!
GANBATTE!!! Don't you dare let them get you down! KICK THEIR @$$e$!! *FIST* Q>O< YOU SHALL CONQUER!
angeangelamori on December 14th, 2005 12:58 pm (UTC)
i'm sorry people suck... and oh my god, but that was sheer RUDENESS! i can't believe they said that!

Couldn't you take your money elsewhere? >_>

(oh, and is there a way for you to send your contact to my phone at 090-8469-FOUR FIVE SIX FOUR? I'll contact you through there. ^_^ Am in hokkaido right now, and it's freezing!!!)
Hi-chan (火ちゃん)hinoai on December 14th, 2005 01:03 pm (UTC)
Do you have Vodafone? ^^ I'll try! ^^

My classes are free. ^^ I definitely wouldn't go to them otherwise.
(no subject) - angelamori on December 16th, 2005 12:50 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Magbabysyusuke on December 14th, 2005 04:12 pm (UTC)

Hope ya feeling better.

Just ignore those ppl k?
EMPEROR, MASTER OF DEATHmonarchist on December 14th, 2005 06:30 pm (UTC)
What's the point of telling to take a lower-level class when they don't offer it? It seems completely ass-backwards to tell you one thing and then do another.

Even if you didn't take a class before going over there, you've learned enough in one year to get by. It sounds like they are expecting you to become fluent in their language in like 6 months. That's highly impossible unless you don't do anything else but study the language, but you're busy, so it's understandable if things like Nagayan's Party come in front of studying the language...

The fact that they were incredibly rude about the whole thing and didn't really offer and one-on-one help, besides books, pisses me off to no end.

I hope things get better. ^_^
ex_whisper13623 on December 14th, 2005 08:48 pm (UTC)
Something like that happened a few years ago when I spent a year in Spain, only it was because of my accent. I studied Castillian Spanish in high school, so I spoke with a Castillian accent (the Spaniards think Castillian is aristocratic and snobby when foreigners do it apparantly) and the school I was at taught and spoke "pure" Spanish so I was always singled out for my accent and told I was wrong. I'm not so composed, though, so I lost it and ranted in the middle of class. *sigh* That was a tough time.
C L O V E R: KIMERU + FLY HIGHidyllica on December 14th, 2005 09:10 pm (UTC)
You know what I do when people send me those crap? BURN THEM!

Seriously, they can't say that because you are working really hard in Japanese and basically, I don't know excuse my french, any shit about Japanese. I only know "desu" and "yadda" or like common words.
But if it still bothers you, go directly to them and er. not yell, well I guess you can do that but you could...like...express your feelings.
It could help relieve your stress. It worked for me.